Whether it comes from a boyfriend, a co-worker, a friend, or a relative, rejection always hurts.
A study by psychologists revealed that we perceive the pain caused by an emotional rejection as intense as physical pain caused by a wound.
In the world of online dating, you may also receive rejections from potential partners who are not interested in meeting you. On social networks, you can “hit” people to remove you from your friends’ list or write malicious comments.
These things should not affect your self-esteem and not let rejection hurt you emotionally. But how can we cope with the feeling of helplessness and disappointment when someone turns their back on us?
- Be aware of what is happening to you
First of all, it is important to be aware of why rejection affects us so much. “At the level of the subconscious, rejection activates the intense fear of abandonment that any person has,” say psychologists. “When we are hit by the fear of abandonment, the whole body reacts and emotionally we are afraid not to die,” say the specialists.
Of course, this process does not happen on a conscious level. No one tells themselves that they will die after being rejected by a person, but it is important to allow ourselves to suffer and to be aware that it is normal to feel a certain degree of emotional discomfort.
- Stay connected to reality
When you are rejected, this can trigger a series of reactions, a micro psychological chaos. Your heart rate increases, you may feel cold sweats or even nausea and dizziness. There are certain exercises that will help you overcome these moments.
One such exercise is to look at your feet and consciously take a few steps, or stand on tiptoe a few times. Or you can clench your fists focusing on the sensations felt in your fingers. You can also do some rotational movements of the neck. Focusing on the various extremities of the body, along with breathing and meditation, helps you become more emotionally stable and react better in situations with a high emotional load such as rejection.
- Cultivate self-esteem
Like the constant care we need to have for our physical health, daily concern for emotional health, and cultivating self-confidence and self-esteem are essential for any human being.
Caring for our body must begin with the physical aspect. We need to provide our body with a healthy, organic diet, to take care to exercise daily, and emotionally, to make time to meditate and cultivate self-esteem.
“If we all learned to love ourselves and invest in this feeling as much as we love others, we could not be hurt so easily,” psychologists explain.
Of course, this does not mean becoming a selfish person or closing in on yourself. The main goal is just to value yourself more, to accept yourself, and to put yourself on a higher level, to feel that you deserve everything that is good in life. Also, you may want to read Bible verses about feeling rejected, which would be a great addition to your life.
- Spend more time in the company of animals
For those who suffer from rejection, the company of animals can work wonders. Animals are very loving and sincere which is why they are used so often in many therapies. If you do not have a pet and do not want to adopt one indefinitely, you can ask your friends to allow you to take their puppy for a walk, for example, or to come and visit and play with their cat. There are also situations when you can take care of someone’s pet only for a short time while the owner is gone.
- Learn what you can from your experience
Maybe the friend who turned his back on you was not a person worth having in your life and it’s better that you got rid of their presence. Maybe your resume was not very well done or do you need more studies to be accepted for the job where you were rejected? Did the partner who just broke up with you make some well-founded reproaches or vice versa?
It is very important to analyze things objectively and see what you can learn from the experience of rejection and focus on what can be constructive in your life.